Answers

People have asked me a lot of questions. Fair enough. They don't understand how difficult it is to come to the U.S.A. people think that just because they are married to U.S. Citizen they are automatically allowed in the U.S. I want to dispel those myths. See, I have friends who are married to Irish, English and even Canadian.  They have all had a struggle to bring their spouses here. One friend, who married a Canadian, had a hard time bringing her husband here, and they were separated for three years and 4 months. (So, this does happen, my friends) They say every case is different. But, I would like to answer those irritating questions. 

1) Why don't you just have (Long Rock) come as a refugee?

To come as a refugee to the U.S.A. you first must register with the U.N. as a refugee. This is something that not only takes times, but is very stringent. Because the country in which Long Rock is from, if he files as a refugee, his family will be persecuted by his government, (like all refugees are because this will have to show admittance to the U.N. that there are human rights issues going on in that country, that will cause people to not want to live there.) To sign up as a refugee is quite a process, and it is difficult to prove you are one. So, after all this time if Long Rock and I sign him up as a refugee, his family will be persecuted by the government, and it will take him longer for him to come. His family can go to prison as well. 

2) Why don't you just go to Canada?

I hate answering a question with a question, but, Why do I have to go to Canada? Where is my job? Where is my home? Where is my citizenship? Don't people know that my Citizenship is not in Canada? And I will have to settle there, get a job (not easy for Americans to get a job there) And then apply for him to come to Canada. And Why do I want to go to Canada when nothing is there for me. This is one of the most irritating questions I have to answer many people... Daily...

 

3) Why don't you just go back to Turkey? 

I hate this question. I hate saying, "Because I am a U.S. Citizen and I deserve to have my husband here, with me, as a married couple. Because, it is his right to be here with me. There are a hundred answers to this question and none of them seem to satisfy anyone who listens to me. 

4) Does your husband really want to be here? I want to answer like this; "Are you kidding me? Can you really be that obtuse?" But, the answer is this, "Yes" and the long answer is this; "The United States Government has all people sign a paper saying, I am so-and-so, and I am signing this paper knowing that (Whomever) bringing me to the U.S.A. is helping me come to America on my own free will and I am not forced to come to the U.S.A." in fact, all people that come to the United States, needs to sign something to that effect. They are willingly signing the paper knowing that they want to come on their own free will. Whether it is a Tourist Visa, or a Student Visa, they all sign something stating they are coming because they want to and aren't being forced into coming. 

Well, I think that about answers everything for now. When I come up with more lovely questions people ask, I will most certainly entertain you all, in the meantime, stay smart.   

Covet Part I

I have always been taught that coveting is a sin. The bible says that when Moses came down from talking to God, he had a set of laws. The people, since he was gone in the mountains for 40 days, they were worshipping a Calf they made from gold, and they were reveling in their freedom, and when Moses saw the people, he broke the commandments that were given, said that they weren't ready for them, and went back to the mountain, and God gave Moses ten commandments, apparently more simple then the ones before. Christians are taught that when Jesus came, he gave the people laws that were more complex, and called "the higher law". Anyway. I don't know what number "Thou shalt Not Covet" is, but, I have never been jealous in all my life. In fact, I have always been happy for those who got recognition or earned something I wanted or didn't have. I have always been happy for others. I never knew what it was like when a friend of mine said "I got this"... and I thought "Gosh I wanted that more than she or he did!" 

Today I think, for the first time in my life I feel jealousy. Or covet something my friend has. In fact, I am annoyed and frustrated she has it. I also feel angry at myself, and shame for feeling the way I feel and I hate it, but I am still jealous and coveting her. 

Let me tell you what happened. Then you can judge me. (please don't judge me too harshly)
I have a friend who has been talking online to a guy for about 1 year and 6 months. The guy she had been talking to came from The Congo, went to Malaysia, and had been there for a couple years, working and going to school. My friend, last July had been telling me if she didn't get her online boyfriend here by the beginning of this year, she would have to stop talking to him because she can't live "like this anymore". I have spoken to him a few times, on Skype, and I supported all her feelings and thoughts about online relationships, and I thought to myself, "Well, hopefully she finds happiness and love". So, about 3 weeks ago, she wrote me about how I need to forget bringing my husband here through the U.S. and how I should just go to Canada, and meet my husband in Canada, and how I should just have a job there, and I would see my husband so much faster. I was not responding to her, and I didn't make her think I was going to take her advice, i just responded to her with an SMS that said, "Thank you for your concern." And a smiley face, sometimes a yellow heart after the SMS. 
Last week, I sent her an SMS that said I was thinking of her and hoped that her week was well, and I would like to see her soon. (I have most this week off). I didn't hear from her for a few days, and that is typical, I mean, she is busy. However, yesterday I got this message from her. It read, "I am sorry I didn't respond to you as fast as I normally do, YYYY is here, let me know when you want to meet him! (excited happy emoji)". When I got this message, I didn't open it. I just sat there. I can read the message without opening it. And I did a couple of times. In fact, I still read it. How? Why? 
(Forget those loaded questions, and do I really want to know the answer to them?) And so, I keep on looking at it. I didn't know what to think or how to feel about it. And I kept digesting this. Over and over. (I have too much time on my hands to think, I admit.) 
I was building myself a fire today and it came to me. I am annoyed. I am jealous of my friend, and I am upset at myself for feeling jealousy. I am angry and I am feeling ashamed at myself for feeling such feelings towards someone whom I deeply care about. I am shocked because I have never felt this way. As I sat watching my fire, I realized, I have prayed, so fervently, to bring my husband here. I have fasted God knows, (in the literal sense) How many months, for the well being of my husband and to bring him here. I have had many people fast with me and for me, to bring my husband here. I have paid thousands of dollars in fees, for my husband to come. I have wept countless nights, missing him, yearning for us to be reunited. How much I have wept. I never thought that a human body could produce so many tears. And when I am done weeping, I drink just to refill my cup with more tears. My husband remains faithful to me. I remain faithful to him. It is like that movie Lady Hawke, in which the man in the night becomes a wolf, and the woman in the day becomes a hawk. And then, there is a moment, where the sun and the moon are up at the same time, where it is dawn and the end of night when the two are human form for just a moment, and they see each other, but never to touch. Their undying love remains with them. And We, my husband and I, are able to talk face to face, but, it is with video chat. We can not touch each other, we are not really together but we are. We did not chose this, we chose to immigrate here, but did not chose this length of time to be away from each other. We would not wish this fate on our worst enemy. And yet, here we are. In this half life. When all of our friends around us can life to the fullest, enjoy and have the pleasure of being with whom they desire and when they desire. And we can smile, be polite and kind, and then when the once filled room is empty, and we are in the silence of our loneliness, can just think and wish and hope that one day we will be together. Is it a dream? Is it a night mare? Will we finally one day wake up and and be together all along and think,"That was a bad dream"? All of this and more, came flooding to me at once while I was looking at the fire. I was angry. Forget god. Take Him out of the equation. We are not together. Then, put God into the equation, as though God had anything to do with it. And we are still not together. So, let's say god does have something to do with our lot, that God knowingly put us apart from each other. That is cruel. What a cruel joke. Are we a pawn in His horrific game that we called life? Did he not care that this is humans suffering? And let's say this lot in life is just a "human chess game", what kind of God was I praying to? What kind of God do I believe in? Let's say that "I am learning something" Which I call bull shit. But, Let's say this is a "Deej And Long Rock has to learn something" Do you think for one second that in 10 years from now I will look back and say, "Boy oh BOY! those Good Ole Days when I was all alone, without my husband he was clear over on the other side of the world! What a great Laugh and Joke that was! I miss those days!" Nor can I ever say "I appreciate all this pain of not being with my husband." Sometimes it just doesn't make sense. Then, my next feeling was frustration. Why would God not answer my damn prayers? did I "do it wrong?" (pray that is) How could I feel like such a big pawn in this whole grand thing called life? Then I felt like, I don't want to see my friend, because I would have to hear how she brought her boyfriend here, and how fast and easy it was and how I didn't do this this or that. How could someone revel like that? Then I felt like "Why should I judge her?" And then I felt angry and coveting, and frustrated, and annoyed at my situation all at the same time.   Then, I felt annoyed with myself. Why could I possibly feel so much anger for someone else? It's not her fault. I should be happy for her. It was then I  realized. This is what it feels like to jealous. Not hate anyone, but, Jealous. She gets to be with her boyfriend before my husband is here. It took her just weeks to bring him here, and me? YEARS to bring my husband here. This is messed up. The whole thing is messed up. Am I right for these feelings? Am I wrong for these feelings? Is God a part of all this? Is He displaced in this? Am I being punished for something I didn't do in a past life or something I did do in this life? What of my in laws and husband? They could not be at fault for any of this. So, it is all me. In my hands. I am the one at fault. So, since it is my fault, who am I to be jealous or covet my friend and her human experience. But, this is my husband. He has a right to be here, and I feel it is not fair in all of this. Fair? What is that? What is fair for me is not fair for someone else, right? And What is fair for someone else is not fair for me. My dad always said, "If life were fair, I'd be King". (Ugh! I hate when my dad is right!) Well, doesn't my husband deserve to be King for the day? Do I deserve to be? Which lead me to ask God, for the first time in my life, "Why God, Can't my husband just be at my side right now?" 
And There was no answer. Just the crackling of the fire I built. 

Bus News III

About 3 years ago, I had wrote about Bus News in the small city I lived in Turkey. I promised an update of that. Let me fill you in. 

Let's start briefly, for my readers who don't want to go looking through all my posts to find the Bus Posts I had written.

About 6 years and 8 months ago Corlu buses were told they could not run unless they were city buses (school buses were ok as well) only. this posed a huge problem because Buses could run in all other cities, however, the mayor of Long Rock's City, wanted to monopolize the bus system in the city. This meant over 2,000 bus drivers were laid off, not promised a job unless they worked for the city, and the city buses were only traveling in certain parts of the city, and not to all the suburbs, causing people to have to walk farther, and this also meant many people who relied on the private buses to walk longer, etc. etc. (now, The buses and transportation to and from Factories were exempt because this city is the factory Mecca of Turkey... The Mayor could not cut the transportation of those factories, it'd be a catastrophe) 

The owner of the private buses, along with a couple of businessmen and lawyers took the city to a Judge who deemed it unlawful for the Mayor to to what he was doing. (Win, right?) 

Mayor decided to re-run in Mayoral elections, and wanted the votes of all the men that he cut jobs from. Long Rock's father is pretty well known in the community and highly respected, among the "old timers of the city" and told Long Rock's father if he would help him win the votes of all the bus drivers and people that he had closed down. If Baba would help with this election, he would be able to drive again.

With this news, the former owner went to a bus manufacturing company and bought several new buses that were brand new, same color (Blue), and hired several people that were the bus drivers before, and putting baba in charge of the new fleet of buses. This was very exciting news for baba and our family, among several other families. 

 So, believing that this Mayor would help baba and all the people that he had brought out of business, baba went out on a limb and helped with the election. Mayor won. And then Mayor went back on the promises. In fact, he did what was worse. He made it so that men over 50 could not have a CDL for driving buses transporting people, and taking away anyone who has a CDL for bus transporting illegal. Meaning, the city took Baba's license for driving buses away from him. Triple Blow. What the mayor did was the most shameful and shady to say the least. 

I don't think that people who make empty promises like this should be made a politician. Yet alone a businessman. It baffles the mind to think that there are many people like this person, preying on other people. And, yet, I am sure it's one of the oldest tricks in the book, making promises to people and not keeping those promises. (Very familiar, isn't it... sadly, too familiar. It should not be so) 

And so, here we are, all of us, the world, trying to be honest in a dishonest world. Trying to trust in a world where we don't have trust. and trying to teach our own children that, in the end honesty and goodness wins, when we all know, we just hopes it wins, and then there are some of us that WANTS the world to be more honest, because it gives us hope that there really isn't that much bad out there. we are honest because we can't allow ourselves to be dishonest, and we are kind and believing, but not weak. Just that we are just and seek justice and good. Trying to get by in a world that has too many humans that lack good grace, and character. And those who are honest, and good and kind are considered weak. Always Do the Right Thing, and Then Do the Smart Thing... because in the end, You just have yourself to answer to, and you can't take money with you to heaven. And you can't be voted into heaven either... Too bad the bad guys can't be voted into Heaven, right?

News Here

It is no secret that I live in a small town, I would even call it a village. I live in what is called a Valley, and there comprises of of 3 small cities, of about 500 each community.  There is probably about 2,500 of us humans that lives here year round, and there are tourists that come here to ski every year, about 65,000 people come here to ski, and then in the summer time, about 150,000 people come to camp and get away from the city, water ski, backpack through the Wasatch Mountains, and Bridger Forest of Northern Utah. In the winter, our land becomes very precarious. (land, earth is that way) There are a lot of avalanches up here, closing the canyon to Powder Mountain ski resort. There is also a lot wind up here. Last night several families in several homes were evicted on the West Side of the Valley. There was a large landslide up here last night, and The Red Cross had to help out the  families that had to be evicted. Geologists and engineers came out today to look at the damage, and what can be done. The land is really soft where there was a slide, and it might not be safe to go back there. I feel really sad for those families, and I hope that they will be safe and can resolve this really soon. 

    This is in a neighborhood near another ski resort called Nordic Valley. Nordic Valley Ski Resort has had a couple of hard years. the skiing has been difficult the last couple of years, and Utah hasn't seen a lot of snow. This year, however, we have had the amount of snow I used to see about 25-30 years ago. Anyone younger than 25 would not remember Utah having this much snow. However, this is great! Finally we are where we should have been over the last three decades. For a couple of days, the weather went up to 40 degrees, and then over night, it's been snowy and cold again. Finally a decent winter. (Not that I am promoting winter, here. I actually strongly dislike winter. But I know we need it to have a great summer. And I want to see a lot of green this spring.) 

For my skiing friends, this is awesome! I have a couple of friends that are snow chasers. They will come here in the winter time, about 3-4 months. Then in Spring (we call it mud season up here) they will go to North Carolina where they live, and then in about June or July they head to New Zealand and Australia where there is skiing in about July or August. 

Right now there is what they call "weather bomb" of snow, sun, rain, and a mixture of all kind of weather. Funny, we call that Utah, all. the. time. We get that year round! HA! 

Well, to my readers far and near, to all corners of the world, whether you read this or not, I hope you all are safe and doing well. Many many greetings to each of you and keep safe. 

Peace, 

Mrs. Phelange...

 

Picture From Valley of Fire

If you enjoy my pictures, please be so kind as to give me credit for the pictures I take. As in Don't get credit for my work. Thank you. 

Picture from Cabo

I thought I would post a picture of the time I spent in Cabo. Proof I was there. I miss the sun, beach, sand, and #3. I want to take Long Rock there. He'd love it. 

Update to my Samsung NP 530

I thought I would give an update to my Samsung NP530.  About 3 and a half years ago I wrote about how Long Rock bought me a laptop. 

I still have Windows 7 on this because I was going to update to Windows 8 after the "kinks" were worked out of it, and then Windows 10 crept up on me. I have many friends that downloaded Windows 10 when they have had to replace their laptops, and in doing so, replaced with a Mac Pro. So, here I am with my trusted little laptop that is now 5 years old. No doubt, it's slow. I can't replace the battery, which needs a new one. The reason being is because this is an older laptop and so I will not be able to find one that is to this laptop's specifications. 
The screen is still great and the graphics are still really awesome, for the age of the laptop. (If you recall, when Long Rock bought this, graphics on this laptop was state of the art, because I wanted to be able to have something to play my games on it, and it still delivers.) Again, please keep in mind that this laptop is 5 years old. 
So, I am still running on Windows 7, possibly Windows 8, refuse to run on Windows 10, and if pressed, I will buy me a laptop that is an Apple to avoid Windows 10. Then I will download a couple of Windows programs. That is the best for me, but, there are others who might have a better option. Of course, I am not a techie, and so this option would would the best for me.  Another thing I did, being that this laptop was a new one from Turkey, and was a great deal, however,  I would like to say that I bought an American Keyboard, and change the keyboard to English. I think if I were to do it again, I would prefer to get a keyboard that lays over the original and not have lots of stickers, have it cover the original Keyboard. Of course, I will not have to worry about it when I replace this one. I kind of wish that the laptops don't run down, and get slower. I quite like this one, and I don't want to keep changing every so many years. 
So, for the time being, I have what I need, and I like what I have.   

Zindagi Gulzar Hai (Pakistani TV Series)

I watched this T.V. series from Pakistan, called Zindagi Gulzar Hai. In English, this means "Life Is Fruitful" or Life is Wonderful. 

Girl and Boy goes to University, Girl is studious and smart, hard working and from a mixed family (father is a cheating S.O.B. mother works super hard, father's live in girlfriend is a total brat... You know the "typical" family?) And so girl has lots of Daddy issues. (Of course). Whilst Boy grew up in a two parent home, Daddy bought him his way into college, and girl and boy meet. Years later, boy and girl happen to work at the same place, and have gotten to spend more time together. Boy asks girl to marry through a mutual family friend. 
There's a couple of things I find sort of interesting in this story that seems to be a tone in Soap Operas. There is always someone that wants to break up the happy couple, (I hate watching Soap Opera's because of this) and It seems like the girls in this TV who are trying to be strong and who are rebuked wear Westernized clothing. Why? Is there something about wearing Westernized clothing that make the girls so wrong? The Boy has a sister who appears to be nonchalant about marriage, is out with her friends all the time, wears western clothing and, she ends up divorcing her husband, because he is too controlling, too conservative. The mother of the boy is very materialistic, and worries more about keeping up appearances than she is about the wellbeing of her daughter,  (this is an Asian issue? I say this because it seems like that when a crisis happens it is, Well, what do I say to the neighbors and friends? attitude. Why can't there be no gossip, which is a very American approach... Just stay out of other people's business... You know, stop gossipping.) 
The boy and girl do end up marrying, and he gets angry at her for something, and she ends up leaving the home, and staying with her mom for a while and then he finds out she is going to have a baby, so he is all, oh please forgive me. 

What is it with these Pakistani men that get angry at their wives, automatically assume the worst of their beautiful brides, sulk around, throw men type tantrums and then realize how stupid they are and ask for forgiveness and boom! Girl goes back to him??? Pakistani women, help me figure this out. Is this for real? I know we are not supposed to use the media to sort out all this cultural stuff. But, I am not intending on going there anytime sooner and I want to know! 
 Some Turkish men are similar, whiney, lack social skills to be self sufficient, yet, rely heavily on their moms, but can be highly emotional and yet really sweet and kind and get angry super fast, I get it. But, I am asking, Pakistani women, please help me understand why you women keep allowing men to be jerk holes and then allowing the men back into your lives. Do you think you can't find anyone better? Because you can. 

It's a good thing there are happy endings in this series. But, i just wonder when I will see real life. I don't think men are this obtuse in Pakistan. I don't think women are treated like second class citizens by all men there. Am I wrong? Am I?  
I will say this Series was more endearing to me than Humsafar. I think because Boy in this is not as harsh as Ashar, and didn't go 4 years or more without talking to wife, for Pete's Sake...

The Walking ... Ummm... What?

I watched the first 3 seasons of the Walking Dead. Maybe... wait... Was it 4 seasons? I last watched it when the main guy was trying to find someone that can help him and his family and the people he's sort of found along the way, find civilization and trying to figure out what has happened to the world, trying to not get eaten or bitten by a Zombie. There were lots of Zombies surrounding them towards the end... Oh wait... I fell asleep... Sorry. Or was the last time I saw this there was another sub- plot of one of main characters friends or brother betraying the small group of friends he already has... Oh wait... I think I gave a spoiler out there. Zzzzzzzzz...
I realized early on there was no plot what-so-ever, and there was just a long long long line of people that the writers want to kill off, and that the main characters are just endlessly wandering around, trying to stay out of trouble, survive, and make money... Borrring. What's next? Zombies falling in love? They have feelings? Oh, that happened. The Walking Dead is another Soap Opera, just add Zombies and, gals, your man will be watching. Unless you have a husband like mine. He and I watched it for a couple of seasons, realized that there was nothing there and moved on... Just like everyone else should.
Yyyawwwnnn...   

Humsafar (Pakistan T.V. Time)

Hello, hello, hello, Dear Readers! I would like to talk about Humsafar tonight. I just finished watching this on U.S.A. Netflix. It is a drama that was produced in 2011. It ran from September 2011- March 2012. 
Humsafar means Companion in Urdu. 
This is a T.V. series that was produced by a female producer who owns her own Channel and the first female producer in all of Asia, to own her own channel and to have her own production company. (This is quite and accomplishment!)
I kept watching Humsafar because I kept hoping there was a happy ending. And there was. But I had a love/ hate relationship with the T.V. series throughout it all. I was frustrated in how the heroine was constantly belittled throughout the entire show, I was annoyed that her husband was a jerk hole throughout the entire show, and he didn't stand up to his mother until the very end. I was irritated that poor innocent Khadir had to endure suffering, humiliation, grief, was reproved in public,and all because her husband didn't even bother to stick up for her. That is the biggest grief I have with this. If her husband loved her so much, why wasn't he soft and kind with her from the beginning? Where was his loyalty? Why didn't he trust her from the beginning? 
I also had a problem with the lead mother, Khadir's mother in law. Khadir is married to her first cousin because on her mother's death bed, her mother and uncle decided to marry Khadir to Ashar, her mother's nephew.
Khadir and Ashar married, and Ashar had a best friend named Sarah who was extremely jealous, and wanted to marry Ashar and have him for herself. 
What I could not gather was why they painted Sarah out to be so bad? Was it her western clothing? Her obsession over Ashar? Her lack of propriety  in social and workplace settings, and often at home, when she was unable to grasp that her childhood friend was in a marriage? Why did the producers even "go there"? And why did Sarah's mother coddle her so much, making her unable to deal with the fact that Ashar had told her several times he did not love her "in that way, only as friends"...
One tends to wonder about so many things... 
The other thing that bothered me was how rude Ashar's mother was towards Khadir. She was awful the entire T.V. show. This woman was not only cruel, but, just a total bitch. Is this how Pakistani producers of a huge Television series wants to portray the Pakistani elite? As attention whores, with no sense of dignity, who hate the social lower classes, and are out to get into their son's marriages, and destroy their grand-daughters life's? I don't get that. Then at the end, the mother of Ashar ends up going mental. Why didn't they address that she was completely wacko from the beginning, and also, did the producers think about how grievous mental illnesses are? How did she have schizophrenia just after Ashar told her she lied and was the worst. mom. ever. Ashar was emotionally detached to his wife before she was accused of being with another man, and he didn't try to stop Khadir's fate... Not once did he come to her aide, yet, he was ever so concerned with Sarah and her lack of being able to move past him, why didn't he, upon marrying Khadir, stop all contact with Sarah, tell her to F off, and fire her if he had to to get his point across. Then spend more time with his wife, get to know her, and love the fact she is independent, strong, intelligent,and went with this? But, instead, they had to go with cutting Khadir to the core, stripping her of dignity, and use the fact she comes from a village and lower class than Ashar. (Which is strange because Ashar's father and Khadir's mother are brother and sister... So he had to have come from the same village and upbringing...) Which the last note tends me to think that If a man in Pakistan makes a name for himself, a woman doesn't matter? It this how men treat their women in Pakistan? I highly don't think so. Of course, I am talking about a soap opera. But, this is something in Downton Abbey in the early 1900's in England, social classes and wealth and how the poor is looked upon. Right? Well, sadly, this T.V. series comes from 2011, in Pakistan. So, can we assume that in 100 years from now they will be up to where we are as far as women are concerned? Is this really a T.V. series that addresses social issues, mental health, suicide, and how women are treated in Pakistan's society? I hope not. I think we tend to objectify the poor, the weak in ALL Societies, not just Pakistan's T.V. series, however, they do it in U.S.A. as well. It's always the "woman" that is mentally ill, the woman who does something wrong, the woman who is the bad person. And the man is considered the savior of woman, the redeemer, man is the one who can make everything alright in the end. Or can he? Does he really? 
This is a question we all, in every society must address. Whether we are man or woman, poor or rich... How do we treat each other? How do we judge those around us? Are we right in our judging? Do we feel shame when we are wrong in our assumptions with people that we don't know? 
I wouldn't watch the series again if asked. Not because I didn't think that the acting was not well, because the actors were fabulous. I would not watch it because I had the hardest time watching the people with the social upper hand condemn the lower classes. It was gritty and frustrating. Was this what the producers wanted?   
I am updating this... 
I have done a little researching and Humsafar is the T.V. version of a novel of the same name, written by Farhat Ishitag, a female author who writes novels and plays. In all actuality, I would love to read the book, as she wrote it from the perspective of Ashar, then of Khadir, written in flashback setting, as though the two are remembering what took place in the past, and their daughter Hareem, bringing them back together. Now, I don't know about you, I would have loved to see more like that.  
The written style of flashbacks don't resonate well with Eastern and Asian audiences however, and so probably it is my frustration in Ashar's immaturity and being a petty guy (maybe?) that has me so critical of Ashar. No doubt, Humsafar is a series that will continue to steal the heart of many women world wide.

A Skit I Have Been Thinking Of

About 6 months ago, I saw a conversation that inspired a skit I thought of and I thought it was really funny. I want to post it before it becomes taken by someone else. 

A guy dies, and is met at the pearly gates with two lines. 
One is "Apple" and the other is "Android". It is all cloudy and happy and clean looking. Saint Paul is helping the Android laine and Saint Peter is in the Apple lane. So, the person is an Apple user, and, Saint Peter is on his Mac Pro, with faster speed putting the people in the places they need to go, because, you know, Apple is better. (Hahaha) 
Well, the guy gets to Saint Peter, and Saint Peter is "busy" typing away on the Mac Pro, and looks up and doesn't stop typing, and he said, "I am in the middle of a blog right now, let me finish this sentence before I save it." The Guy is irritated, and says, "But, I have been standing in line for a long long time". and Saint Peter says, "Well, you think you're going somewhere anytime soon? HAHAHAHA". The guy shakes his head, in disbelief, and really irritated, but what can he do? Saint Peter is in charge of the lane. He gets done after a couple of seconds, and says, "Will the person next in line come approach my desk?" The desk is more of a Judge's Bench, huge, made of mahogany, and super tall, taller than an average human, but there is clouds all around, and behind Saint Peter is a screen, that isn't noticed before. It's all clouds and pretty scenes and looks like a picture, but when looking at it more carefully, It's a huge screen. The guy  approaches the judge's bench, and as he comes forward, Saint Peter says, "Wait, wait, I need a selfie of this, Hollaaaaaa!" and Twitters, "Front Desk of Heaven, Selfie, Hashtag Whatsup, Hashtag Holla, Hashtag Dude" And puts his iPhone down, and says, Let's see where you are going to go... Now, I have your Facebook, Instagram, What's Up, Twitter account in front of me, let's go through it, shall we?" And just then, The screen has all the social media up on the Screen behind St.Peter, and for the guy to see.
The guy tries to protest his rights for Privacy, and how he thinks this is just ludicrous that he would have to stand in line for "This"... and pointing at the screen, protesting. Saint Peter, really calmly is saying, "Dude, you'll be here a lot longer, everyone has to go through this"
So, Saint Peter says, "On Easter Sunday, noon, you posted on Instagram a cute bunny with 'Happy Easter, Jesus is the Reason for the Season', that is nice and cute, but then you posted a scripture at 12:30 in the afternoon on Facebook, with a picture of your family. When was church? weren't you supposed to be teaching Sunday School on that day?"
But, the guy make up for it on Wednesday when the guy posted that your family and yourself had a good Sunday at church, on Easter Sunday, so most likely the guy were on his phone at church, giving the benefit of the doubt. But, the following Friday, the guy posted a very rude comment on a news media about a celebrity, and that wasn't Christian- like Material, but on Saturday, he posted on his profile something about saving the world, so it cancels out the rude comment. Thus the Judging continues, and then, Saint Peter says, "Wait, I have to do another selfie, on Heaven's Sake's Twitter Account, to keep up the criteria". Irritated the guy relents because he really has no control over it, and he is used to it by this moment. Just as Saint Peter is done, Jesus walks in from behind with his latest iPad, and iPad Pro, 12 inches, with 256 GB and another 100 GB of iCloud storage. Jesus comes from behind St. Peter, and people in line are all, "Yeah Jesus! " and Jesus is all, "wait wait, I have to get a selfie with my homies" (Jesus is of course Middle Eastern) And he takes pictures on his iPad with St. Peter, and they are totally buddy buddy, and the guy is beside himself, when Jesus says, yeah, ( the guy) an Apple user, but, you are going to hell because you didn't post anything about helping any refugees, and didn't help with the needy and poor, but just posted a lot of political mumbo- jumbo. He also got points docked for claiming to be a devout Christian but, "Liked" and "Re-Tweeted" several anti-Gay rhetoric, viewed porn and was holding an extramarital affair, while claiming to be Christian. But, was given credits for being Anti- North Korean (government) and highly critical of global waste. 

I know it is silly and highly politically charged, but, I think a lot of it funny, and good satire. I think it would make a funny skit, but probably has been written before. This is my rendition of what it would be  like if I were a writer. 
  

Happy New Year (Another Movie Review)

Hey, readers! 
I watched another Bollywood movie.. It's called "Happy New Year" It is produced by Red Chili Entertainment. It was filmed about 3 years ago. Location is India and Dubai. 
 The ratings is conflicting. See, the critics gave it a low rating, and didn't really like the movie, however, it is to this day one of the highest grossing films yet. Fans love this movie. 
I am kind of in the middle. Shah Rhuk Khan is in it, so you know it is going to be a big movie. (And everyone by now should know, I am an SRK fan) 
This movie is about a man, Charlie,  who, 8 years before, lost his father in prison, and it was caused by a set up by Charan Grover. Charlie wanted to get revenge on Charan, and he does it through a few friends and a beautiful dancer who teaches the team how to dance and win the World Dance Championship that takes place in Dubai. 
There's parts that are funny, and cheesy. I do have to add that the Martial Arts in this was pretty good. Shah Rukh Khan does a lot off screen to keep up his physique, and you can see that on screen. He also does his own stunts, and you can see that on screen. SRK puts 150% of everything he does into his movies, and this one is no exception.
I think that this movie is good for a younger crowd, and the humor is all the way through it, but, it doesn't hang on with me like others that SRK has done in the past. I do appreciate this piece of work, It just didn't captivate me from the beginning to end, and that is ok for me, not all movies will. I put the list of cast and characters below, because each one of them deserves an applause.   
Cast as follows: 
Shah Rukh Khan as Chandramohan "Charlie" Sharma
Deepika Padukone as Mohini Joshi
Abhishek Bachchan as Nandu Bhide/Vikki Grover (double role)
Sonu Sood as Captain Jagmohan "Jag" Prakash
Boman Irani as Tremhton "Tammy" Irani
Vivaan Shah as Rohan Singh, Jag's nephew
Jackie Shroff as Charan Grover
Varun Pruthi as Charan's Assistant
Kavi Shastri as Mr Gupta
(Special Appearances)
  Anupam Kher as Manohar Sharma (Charlie's dad) 
Daisy Irani as Tammy's mother
Sarah- Jane Dias as Laila
Dino Morea as host of World Dance Champion
Kiku Sharda as Saroj Khan/ (dance choreographer)
Prabhu Deva as dance instructor
Malaika Arora Khan as the heroine of a film
Anrung Kashyap as himself, a Judge of the World Dance Championship
Vishal Dadlani as himself, a judge of the World Dance Championship
Sajid Khan as director of a film
Geeta Kapoor as Judge of World Dance Championship  
Vishal Malhotra as host of the World Dance Championship Auditions
Gauri Khan as herself (cameo in the end credits)
AbRam Khan as himself (end credits, first debut)
Farah Khan as the worst dance championship judge (cameo in the end credits)

The Big Win

I am writing in green because I won money! 
Before I went on my excursion to Valley of Fire, and after my excursion to Cabo, I took a side trip to Vegas, and went on a sub-side trip to Laughlin, Nevada. I stayed with my parents in a little hotel room, and instantly realized I was the youngest person in the hotel. The Oak Ridge Boys were also staying there, and performing. My parents wanted to have a little date night, and so I told Long Rock that I would go to a slot and gamble for him, just for fun. I put 10.00 in the slot, and got to 50 cents. I ended up betting the last 50 cents and won 16.00! So I was on the way to taking my ticket to the cash cage, when I saw this slot machine with "Kronos" on it! I could not resist! I ended up putting the 16.00 ticket in the slot and lost it all. I was upset and felt like I could not go back to the room not have won and given up all my winnings (the 6.00 I won!) So, I put in a dollar. I won 37.00!!! So, I put in another dollar and won and 30.00! I won a total of 67.00! I took my two tickets to the cash cage, they gave me the 67.00 and I did not play again... So, I would say I won a total of 57.00 because of the 10.00 I lost... This is my Big Win... I hope Long Rock would like to play the penny slots with me one time. It'd be fun! 
(Wendover, Vegas, Mesquite? What do you say, Long Rock?)

The Valley of Fire

Outside the small city of Overton, Nevada, and just about 50 miles Northeast of Las Vegas there lies a beautiful little gem of a state park. It is called The Valley of Fire. It is 45,000 acres of pure Desert Beauty! The easiest way to get there from Vegas is by car, and this park you pay by the vehicle. If you are a Nevada State Resident, you will pay 8.00 a vehicle. If you are an out of state resident, you will pay ten. If you are in a large group, Reservations are 25$ per reservations, plus per vehicle rate. Camping is allowed, only in designated areas, and by sunset, you are supposed to be in your camp sites, and not roaming parts of the park, or it is considered trespassing. 
I paid 8$ and it was worth every penny. 
I entered from the West Entrance, and from there, stopped at the Beehives, which looks like Beehives. I couldn't stay long, because I was wanting to get to the petroglyphs. So, I got out of my car, snapped a couple photos, and then stopped by the Petrified Logs to get another photo of one. I then hopped into my car, went by the Visitors Center, and drove a little bit up the road from there to "Mouse Tank". Although there seemed to be many cars upon arrival, I didn't feel over crowded with people when I got there. I really loved that, actually. I was at Mouse Tank for 4 hours, and I feel like I still didn't see everything. I am sure I didn't see all the petroglyphs, and this is why I want to go back. Next time, I will bring the Long Rock with me. He will love it there. 
The petroglyphs is believed to have been there for over 2,000 years. Archeologists have speculated the meanings of the petroglyphs. The petroglyphs are believed to be Pueblo (Anasazi) to Pre-Pueblo. It is said that the petroglyphs are stories or maps, and even speculated that this region of people were probably on an altered state of mind while making the drawings, because the glyphs appear to have more of a shayman quality. The other difficulty in interpreting the glyphs in this region is the reason being that Paiutes of the area don't really know what they mean, either, and the Anasazi have remained a mystery. 
 Mouse Tank, also known as Petroglyph Canyon, is where you can find a lot of glyphs in Valley of  Fire, and, I wanted to see this for myself.  Mouse Tank is named for a natural basin that fills up with water from the rain that is collected throughout the year. Mouse Tank is a half mile trail, both ways, from the parking area. Mouse Tank is also named after a renegade Native American who was a Southern Paiute. He used the Valley of Fire as a hideout in the 1890's after he was accused of killing two prospectors and some other crimes he committed in the region. (His name was actually Little Mouse). 
Here, in this little ravine of rock formations, are so many petroglyphs. I will be bold in saying that the petroglyphs are not confined in just Petroglyph Canyon (aka Mouse tank), but, I think they're all over Valley of Fire, and there is another place called Atlatl Rock that is quite remarkable, however, I didn't get there. 
So, I saw people come and go while I was in the canyon. As I mentioned, I was there for four hours, although the canyon is 1/4 of a mile, I hiked around, went up and down and didn't stay on the path, and felt like I could have stayed there for hours more, and still have found more petroglyphs. As I looked and looked and walked more than 2.8 miles in the 1/4 mile canyon, and 14 floors of stairs, I wondered if all the people who go there actually see everything, or if they just see the main maybe three or four that are in plain sight. If you aren't paying attention, you can very easily miss them. It was amazing. In fact, I was snapping photos and didn't even realize until I got home and zoomed in, that there were parts of the walls of the canyon that had writings on them... It made me definitely want to go back and bring a really good camera with me, and hike around more. In fact, I would love to stay in the park to get as much hiking, camping time as possible. upon my return and reading more about this beautiful region. I live in quite a remarkable area, and I found there are places to see more Petroglyphs. I am marking up my map of places to go and things to do and see!  
I look forward to writing more about this topic and can't wait to get some more time to go, see, do!

Cabo San Lucas, Mexico

My birthday was a while ago. #3 and I had been thinking about where we going to go to escape snow, rain, cold, and clouds. We debated whether or not to go to Southern California, New Orleans, or somewhere in the Bahamas, we were just looking. We decided on Cabo San Lucas. And we made a GREAT choice. 
Cabo is wonderful!
It was my first time going to Cabo, and #3, as well. We flew out of our home towns, and met at a connecting flight at LAX. Every flight to and from there is full, and fills up fast. We then got a city bus at Terminal 1
We tried to get a city bus at the international terminal, however, the city bus drivers said that we couldn't get on. (They were trying to promote the taxi's for the tourists, and allowing the locals to use the city bus... jerks) 
So, for $80 U.S. dollars you can take a taxi cab from the San Juan Cabo International airport to San Lucas Cabo, or take the city bus for $5 U.S. dollars. 
It was the first time for us to use Airbnb. The person who hosted us on Airbnb is named Adrian. He is great. He is born and raised in Cabo, and knows the area. He speaks English fluently, which helps. That being said, the locals don't understand that American women travelling alone in Mexico need to remain vigilant at all times. 
#3 and I didn't want to stay at a resort because we felt it would have taken away the experience for what we wanted. 
The first night we went to a restaurant, and were in bed before 11:00 pm, and were in bed before the tourists came out for city life. We didn't want to be in the nightlife in Mexico. We arrived at our place at about 4:30, and so about 5 pm we were on our own. first step in order, introduce #3 to Cocos Frios! Absolutely the BEST ever. We then asked her to open it, and she put chili peppers and scooped out the meat of the coconut for us, and we ate it like that... Aaahhh... 

Day One: We woke up earlier than most people, walked to a small place for breakfast, and we had a plate of fruit, fresh fruit, and plain yogurt, #3 had coffee. It was pretty bad tasting, but total meal, $3.00 USD. We walked to the docks by 9:30 and found a deal. The gentleman would take us on a tour around the cape, and drop us off at the beach that is accessible from the water. We saw beautiful fish, seals, Lovers Beach, the marker that divides the Pacific Ocean and the Cortez Sea, and we saw a whole bunch of other wonderful things and went to the beach that was semi secluded. We realized a water taxi is used by the locals and they are way cheaper, but we were happy where we were. 
We were on Pelican Bay for 2 hours, and were sitting at a fresh shrimp taco stand drinking Hibiscus juice, and eating shrimp tacos with fresh guacamole by 2:30 (we took lots of water with us) 
We went back to the hotel room by 3:30, washed off the sane and went to dinner. Back at the apartment by 7pm. 

Day 2
We wanted to go to the beach, and I thought there was a great beach that the locals went to, and so we began to walk on this main street, and walking West, kept on walking. I spoke Spanish, and, again, people were trying to get us to go on the resort beaches. We didn't want to be there. Well, we walked for a while. #3 hurt her foot pretty badly a couple months ago, and so we found a rickshaw. The gentleman was willing to take us to the end of the road, another couple of miles, and we hung out at the beach. We then walked back to the apartment after a few hours on the beach, and went out to eat again.

Day 3 
We went to a beach on a city bus called Chileno Beach. 
We slept, soaked in the sun and I walked to these rock formations. #3 was laying in the sun, and I had HAD to call her to come to the formations where I was. We were the only people willing to go on the formations, and there were colonies of crabs, which were bright blue and purple colors. We just enjoyed the beauty of the nature around us and we sat on those rocks for quite sometime. We were on the beach for about 4 hours total, and went back to the place we were staying. Each way about 2 dollars on the city bus. It was awesome. When I say awesome I mean the literal term, as in awe. We were both in awe with the water, the beauty, the beach, and we had so much fun, and good bonding time. another Coco Frio. After opening it this time, we added more fruit to it. I chose papaya. #3 chose strawberries. Yum!

Day 4 
We slept in, had a relaxing morning, took it easy. We did last minute shopping, and ate a yummy dinner. Every night we were in our place before 9 pm. 

Tips: 
Before you go to any country, Mexico and Canada included, always talk to your telephone wireless carrier. This will cut back on roaming charges and many fees. 
If you are sick, there are clinics next to the Pharmacies, and if you pay about 50 pesos, you can get adequate care. Mind you it is not fancy, and it is like after hours, but it's there. 
Haggling is OK with the street vendors selling souvenirs, not in a regular store.
A couple of restaurants have a great scam! A friendly lady will come and sit next to you, you think she is with the restaurant, and will be very nice and speaks English with you, and before you know it, you are paying $30 bucks for a day trip to a "Resort that is going to be built" 
DON'T DO IT... You don't have to ever pay for a beach access, unless you want to buy a cola or a beverage on a resort and use their beach... Don't let kindness fool you in Mexico. They want something from you!!!
Go to the restaurants that are not super full, but, that have locals going to them. You will not be charged as much
Be Vigilant
Be Smart
Don't buy something you know you can buy in the USA 

Happy Travels!

The Renal Failure Diet

I have one kidney. I was born with two. When I was 13, my mom and I were in a pretty bad car accident. 

 Since then, I have been really careful with my kidney. Well, I try to be.  I have tried to avoid sports that would hurt or damage the only one I have. 

  I drink a lot of water. In fact I drink probably more water than the average person. I do this because if I don't, my kidney hurts, and if feels really hard. It means it's dehydrated. 
The first part of January I had a virus that was really painful terrible. From this virus, I got pretty dehydrated and steadily, my kidney kept hurting me. Now, let me back up a couple months ago. I decided I wanted to make some life changes and get some vitamins. The vitamins are excellent and I was taking them as directed on the bottle. I thought that taking them was a healthy choice for me. 
One type of vitamins are called Greens. Greens are a powder mixed with water or put in your smoothie. If you buy the right kind, it is great! It is 100% foods (like kale, dandelion, minerals, etc etc.) 
Another I was taking are potassium supplements. I have been having a hard time getting my kidney to function last summer when I took a fall. My Dr. told me to take potassium because he prescribed me a a "water pill" to help me out with my lack of urine out take and my water retention because of my kidney. (Always check with your Dr. in any health issue, readers. I am just sharing my experience. Everyone is different and your Dr. will help you with what is best for you)
I also was taking a supplement called "Hair, Skin,Nails" by a company I want to review later. 
I was taking Daily vitamins, and another to help me with burning fat, called Thermo by the same company.  
And then of course Vitamin D3. 
I was feeling O.K. and I was trying to catch up on my energy levels. But, I got that virus and just felt so sick. I had been feeling sick off and on since June anyway. So, I felt like these vitamins will boost my energy, get me healthy and boost my immune. 
I started feeling so sick, and what is worse, I hadn't urinated for more than two weeks and my skin was feeling tight. Indeed I was so sick! My kidney wasn't/ isn't functioning properly. 
I decided to do some investigation in what actually was in all the vitamins, and why did I feel so sick taking so many. 

Here is what I found out. 

Potassium: Potassium (a mineral) is an electrolyte found in your body that does important things for our heart. It helps the heart function, in keeping the heart beat in the correct rhythm. Potassium also aids nerve conduction and muscle contractions, among many other functions. Too little potassium is detrimental to one's health, however, too much can also harm kidneys. 

The Greens advertised that it raised the alkaline levels in your body. This is a huge fad right now, drinking "Smart Water", "Fiji Water", "Icelandic Water", etc etc. These waters raise your alkaline levels, and make you feel like you are supposed to drink it, because again, it is a fad. The Greens I was taking did raise my alkaline, and people were thinking that is just marvelous. Well, first you need to understand what alkaline is and the function and what it can do if you take too much. First of all, the alkaline diet is supposed to help maintain your ph blood levels. 
First of all, a ph level measures how much acid or alkaline something is. Those levels are throughout your body. A ph level of 0 is completely acid, and a ph level 14 is totally alkaline. your blood is slightly alkaline of 7.35 to 7.45. Your stomach ph level is about a 3.5 or below. The acid levels in your stomach help you to break down the food you eat. Your urine ph levels change, depending on what your eat and drink. This helps keep your blood ph levels stabilized. the fact of the matter is, nothing you eat will change the levels of your alkaline. Your body works to keep that level constant. There are many claims about the alkaline diet, but, eating lots of vegetables and good foods, will already help you lose weight and be healthy. Too much alkaline in the body causes confusion, cardiovascular problems, metabolic abnormalities, causes kidney damage, can make you dehydrated, etc, etc. In fact, Alkaline water is a total gimmick and is awful for your health. 

Phosphorus is a common ingredient in the Greens, alkaline waters, and vitamins. Phosphorus is abundant in the body, second to calcium. Both calcium and phosphorus work together for bone and teeth strength. Too much of it, in kidney function actually breaks your teeth, bones, and isn't good for kidney function when you have kidney problems. 

I decided to look into what I could do to help my kidney. I was feeling awful, gaining water weight, and just plain miserable. I found that I needed to put myself on the Renal Failure Diet. I called my Doctor, and told him about what had been happening and he was very pleased that I decided to go on this diet.  
So, what is the renal failure diet?
It's a very difficult diet for those who like sugar, salt, and breads (starches). I first stopped taking vitamins, and my Dr said, "You can get all the vitamins you need by eating the proper foods." This is true. I then stopped eating foods with high potassium, starch, sodium, no water with alkaline, (so, my fellow one kidney readers out there, no water that is fancy, no water with minerals in it. just plain cheap bottled water is healthier for you!) Next, I started tracking calories, fat, protein, carbohydrates. Fat is important to have in your diet, if it is unsaturated fat. Unsaturated fat helps lower your cholesterol. Again, too much fat is not good for you, so it is all about moderation. I still go to the gym, but, I am walking right now in a pace that is good for me, and 6.7 miles a day is really good. I am still really  tired. But, I am gradually feeling better. I know what to eat, and I went on the American Kidney Association, and a couple of other web pages that were written by Doctors specifically focus on Kidney health, and I feel better. When my kidney isn't working well, I am so tired and I feel sluggish. But, I don't over do it on the treadmill either. There is a balance in everything and must be. Right now for me, I am eating vegetables that are good for the kidney. I am eating berries, and even watch what fruits I eat. The first week was hard. Now it has been about 12 days. It has been more easy. I ate a sugary cinnamon roll, and it was not working well for me. I threw up because my kidney could not handle it. I have been able to urinate average of 1-2 times a day, which still isn't much, but it will get better. I will post another thing that has been helping me with my kidney. It's a couple of teas. That is my next post.